Starting Over
by Endsong
Summary: Set after Phoenix: Endsong and Phoenix: Warsong. with crossovers to Astonishing X Men. Jean Grey has found her pieces and has returned, but what of her place in the world? T to M. JeanLogan, ScottEmma, etc. Please R&R! CHAPTER 5 UP!
1. Finding Her Pieces

A/N: I don't own any of these characters (sadly)

* * *

Soft whispers of movement as she came together rang through the room.

_I thought...I had been destroyed..._

A few more pieces came, adding to the form.

_It was so close. The Shi'ar..._

Another piece.

_I wish they hadn't done this to me. To my pieces. All the trouble..._

More pieces, filtering back into place.

_Scott..._

Better not to think of him. Too painful.

_Logan..._

Also painful. But less so...

_I never meant...It wasn't right..._

Better to stop there for now.

_Almost there. Just a few more pieces..._

Finally. Together at last.


	2. To Meet Again

Title: Starting Over (title may change as story goes on)

Pairing: Well, several. Jean/Logan and Scott/Emma for sure. Maybe a bit of Kitty/Colossus and Rogue/Remy for fun and flair. We'll see.

Rating: T at the beginning (mainly for language, because dude...seriously...Logan swears a lot.), M (for fluff, maybe?) later on.

A/N: I've gotten a few lovely messages about the story and I appreciate the intrest! The chapters may be a little slow in coming, but they'll come...I promise. Also: This is a combination of the after effects of Phoenix: Endsong, Phoenix: Warsong, and the Astonishing X Men series. Yay for complicatedness! And a side note: things in dashes, like -sniff- refer to actions. I don't think I'll be using that MUCH, but just a little bit.

* * *

A cloud of red hair fluttered in the wind, caught in the approaching storm. The owner of the hair turned, seeming to relish the feel of the wind on her face. Gentle green eyes displayed a hint of sorrow reflected the brilliant colors of the trees around her. She sat, as out of place in that forest as a tree would be in the middle of a parking lot. But she had a reason to be there.

She'd found her favorite old fragrance, the musky vanilla one that had been her trademark at the school she'd grown up in and worked at. She made sure it was applied with careful consideration; this wasn't about personal hygeine. This was about attracting a certain someone's attention.

_Will...will he talk to me? Will he even want to, considering all I've done? Will he respect that I don't wish to intrude on their lives, I just...I miss them. _

It was her need of them that brought her here.

* * *

-sniff-

_I've smelled that before. That musky perfume. But I ain't smelled it since..._

The man started, eyes nearly popping out of his head.

_It can't be. We just finished exorcising the Phoenix from those stupid Cuckoos a few months ago. She can't be back yet._

His nose twitched again, another swirl of the scent making his brain want to explode with the possibilities.

Possible, impossible, he didn't care. He had to know.

* * *

_He's coming. Oh God, I don't want to do this I have to do this I can't I won't I'll just go- oh shit. He's here._

It hadn't taken long for the man to find the woman by the scent she wore. It was the scent he'd known her by since the first day they met: that lovely tingle of vanilla musk, used lightly, and mixed in with the usual other odors of deodorant (baby powder) and shampoo (citrus). He'd gone to bed many nights with that exact combination of fragrances in his nose, wishing that he could bury his face into the owner's neck and sleep peacefully for once. But the owner had been down the hall, another man's face buried into it and inhaling the sweet fragrance.

He stood, in his usual uniform of jeans slung low on the hips, a tank top, a button up shirt over it all, and those boots of his that he always wore everywhere. Before him sat the woman with the fiery red hair, the sad green eyes, and the clutching hands he want to take and kiss and keep around him.

"Hi Logan." The woman looked up from the log she was sitting on, tentatively. It'd been no problem to bring him here, but now she wasn't entirely sure what she would say.

"Jeannie...is..." he couldn't continue, fearing what had happened last, fearing what might be.

"Logan, I..." A nervous twitch of her hands distracted them both.

"I've found all my pieces."

The man called Logan sat down hard, taking it all in.

"You mean you're-"

"I've found all my pieces. You know what it means."

"Jeannie, I'm not gonna do it again. You don't know, you don't realize how much it hurt me to do that to you." He felt himself getting angry, wanting to tear into the woman he called Jeannie. "Didn't you think it'd almost kill me to do that?!? Did you not think at all? Why couldn't you hav-"

"Logan."

The still, quiet voice made him stop.

"I'm not crazy. I'm not twisted by Mastermind, I'm not a clone. I'm not insane from the Shi'ar driving the Phoenix force to the ends of the universe, hunting her down like game. I'm clean, and pure, and without any evil inclinations in me. I'm back together again."

"Then why come here? You could go anywhere." Logan couldn't help the edge in his voice. He wanted Jean...God, he wanted her. He loved her! But things were so complicated at the school with the Cuckoos and Quentin Quire and then the whole Scott and Emma ordeal.

_Damn that one eyed freak for all this. If he hadn'tve fucked over Jeannie in the first place..._

Jean looked away, almost as if saddened by his anger.

"I had friends here. I had a husband here at one point. I don't want to dig up the past, or try to make it like it was. I know Scott's moved on, and I know things are different. But...it was my home, my job, my life...for years. I can't help missing it, missing the people...missing my friends, like you." Her head titled at the last statement, eyes gazing at him with the question of their friendship in them.

Logan nodded, both understanding her needs and admitting to their continued friendship.

"I won't keep you long. But you can reach me here," Jean handed him a slip of paper, "if you ever need anything."

He glanced at it, then back at Jean to find she was already walking away into the trees.

"Thanks, Red..."


	3. Phone Call

**Title:** Starting Over (title may change as story goes on)

**Pairing:** Well, several. Jean/Logan and Scott/Emma for sure. Maybe a bit of Kitty/Colossus and Rogue/Remy for fun and flair. We'll see.

**Rating:** T at the beginning (mainly for language, because dude...seriously...Logan swears a lot.), M (for fluff, maybe?) later on.

**Disclaimer: ** I DO NOT OWN THIS OR ANY MARVEL CHARACTERS. Ever. Please don't sue, eh? All I have in life is my precious lappy.

**A/N:** I've gotten a few more messages and I appreciate it SO much. So now, for you all...a bit of sweetness.

* * *

Jean Grey was not having a good day.

She sat in her bed, wishing the past several hours hadn't happened. She'd come so close to running into Scott and Emma while Emma was shopping...so so close. She'd had to hide under her desk to keep from being seen.

_In picking a career outside of the X Men, I should have considered Emma Frost's tastes in clothing._

Jean had found a decent (though not extremely well paying) job working as a fashion designer's assistant in an up and coming business. She helped come up with funky new designs for the clothing, checked out fabric samples, ran errands for the Jay Ketterby, the designer, and even helped to model them on occasion. The designer and all those working for him turned out pieces that were alluring and sensual without being overly risque, and the designer was becoming quite a hit among some of the elite. Emma must have heard about him through her society friends and come for a visit.

_Damn them. Damn them all to hell for making me do this._

When Jay Ketterby found her under her desk, he asked quietly for an explanation. She gave him the one that "Oh, well, I used to date Scott, the man with Emma, and we broke up on some not-so-friendly terms". He seemed to accept that, and Jean was relieved to not have to tamper with his head to get him to go away.

Curling up in the bed, she thought how lucky she was so far to escape detection. She'd found a little apartment on the outskirts of New York City that was charming and more or less cheap. A few coats of paint, some furniture, and other decorations and she'd had a nice apartment she could go home to and shut out the rest of the world.

_It's so different, though...there aren't people everywhere._

_I miss that._

With a small shrug, she turned over and prepared to sleep.

Then the phone rang.

* * *

Logan paced back and forth in his room, phone held to his ear. He was thankful this was a private line, that no one could accidentily pick up the phone and hear what was going to be said.

_Nothin's gonna get said if Jeannie doesn't pick up the damn phon-_

"Hello?" a tired, obviously frustrated voice said.

Logan swallowed nervously. "Uh...Jeannie?"

"Hi, Logan."

"Hi yerself. Thought I'd call and see how yer doin. If that's ok..."

"Oh, that's fine! You can call anytime you want. Well, not anytime...I have a job. But you can call. When you can." Nervousness of a similar kind flowed from Jean's voice.

"Well...what're you workin' at?"

_Safe topics, Logan. Keep her on safe topics._

"I'm an assistant for a fashion designer in New York City. I help design, choose fabrics, stuff like that. Nothing huge...it helps me pay the bills." Jean bit her lip, thinking again of the old house and how she hadn't had to worry about things like bills for years, and never while at the Institute.

"You always were the modeling type. They have ya doin' that, too?" amusment tinged his voice. He remembered the parties and the dresses she'd wear. She was always the most beautiful woman at any event they went to...she beat Ororo, Rouge, and Kitty to pieces with her looks and how she carried herself.

_Always the one all the guys stared at, Jeannie._

"Yeah, a little. It's fun. I haven't done it in years...but they're saying I've still got the knack for it. Plus I get to wear pretty clothes a lot." Jean smiled.

"Can't say I'd mind seeing you in some of those." Logan replied easily.

_And out. But then I think both of us know that._

Jean snikered. "I bet that's not all you'd want to see. You'll never stop, will you?"

That got a full out laugh from Logan. "Nope, and don't ever expect me to, darlin. You know how I feel."

Jean did know. She knew all too well how Logan had loved her since he first saw her. But she couldn't talk of it, not yet.

"What do you think of this weather? All the crazy snow and ice. It's been driving everybody in the city crazy this week."

"Well, Bobby, Kitty, and Rouge decided that they were gonna gang up on me and try to dump a load of snow on me. I stalked them around the grounds and plastered all of them several times...they barely even got me." a wolfish grin spread Logan's face wide.

Laughter came from the other end of the phone.

"I bet that would've been a sight to see. And the moon...it's amazing outside."

Logan decided to do a bit of hinting. "Yeah, it is. Too bad yer not here so we could take a walk in it."

Jean took the bait, teasing, "And tell me, where would we walk where we couldn't be seen and wouldn't get buried?"

"Out by the lake. On the dock. Near the boat house. You ain't seen how it's been all fixed up recently. It gets used in the summer a lot."

Jean bit her lip just a little, thinking over his offer.

"The stars are out tonight. Real bright, too."

_Damn you, Logan._

She knew she'd lost the battle to stay away.

"Just...give me about an hour to get there, ok?"

"I'll meet ya by the boat house."

_Success, Logan. Success. Now to try and win her friendship...and maybe..._

Logan cut himself off. First things first.

* * *

A/N: Short, I know. But there'll be more soon!  



	4. Lake of Beauty

**Title:** Starting Over (title may change as story goes on)

**Pairing:** Well, several. Jean/Logan and Scott/Emma for sure. Maybe a bit of Kitty/Colossus and Rogue/Remy for fun and flair. We'll see.

**Rating:** T at the beginning (mainly for language, because dude...seriously...Logan swears a lot.), M (for fluff, maybe?) later on.

**Disclaimer: ** I DO NOT OWN THIS OR ANY MARVEL CHARACTERS. Ever. Please don't sue, eh? All I have in life is my precious lappy.

**A/N:** GAH. NO UPDATES IN FOREVAH. I suck. BUT I HAVE A NEW CHAPTER FOR YEW!!! So dun hate me? 3 (a tad of snuggling here, for y'all's enjoyment. :D)

* * *

Jean scrambled to throw clothes on and raced for her car. It was everything she could do to not break the speed limit (much) on her way towards the institue. When she finally got close, she pulled into a strand of trees and walked the rest of the way, nearly bouncing on her toes.

_Am I a fool for being excited that Logan invited me to the school? Even if it's only to the lake?_

A heady question.

_And am I crazy for being so glad it's Logan and not somebody else?_

Too deep. Think of the moonlight.

She walked out of the trees surrounding her and stepped out to see the lake bathed in silvery moonlight, the snow catching every little reflection and facet of the light. The lake was frozen solid (in part thanks to Bobby), the boathouse and dock covered in a solid 9 inches of snow. The stars twinkled delicately in the crisp cool air, creating an almost otherworldly feel.

Jean couldn't help but gasp at the beauty.

She saw Logan pacing back and forth near the end of the dock, the path of his footsteps leading back to the mansion. Trudging forward, Jean made her way towards the dock.

_It's...cold. Holy crap it's cold why didn't I think to bring my gloves COLD!!! That'll teach me to fly out of the house and forget my gloves._

She had reached the beginning of the dock by this point and saw Logan turning around towards her.

* * *

Logan couldn't help pacing back and forth at the end of the dock, doing his best to search out something he could attack. He wasn't angry. Just...antsy. Nervous. Perhaps a touch excited? 

_Down boy. Dooowwwnnn boy. Just relax, let it happen. No need to be gettin' all nervous and worked up._

Yeah, right.

He heard the crunch of footsteps and sniffed, the barest trickles of cucumber and melon filling his senses. That was one of the things he had always liked about Jean...she never wore any of those damned flowery perfumes that overpowered his senses and made him want to rage at the rest of the girls in the mansion. She always kept it simple...vanilla, citrus, or his personal favorite, that mix of cucumber and melon. It occurred to him that all women should smell like that...fresh, clean, almost pure. He'd never admit it, but he had bought a little cucumber melon candle and hid it in his belongings, bringing it out to sniff on rare occasions. He couldn't bear to forget the scent.

And so he paced. Back and forth, back and forth. Better to pretend for now that he hadn't noticed she was here.

He gazed out over the iced lake, taking in the blue-tinged beauty around him.

Cuz, you know, it wasn't like he'd been waiting out here since she called. Over an hour. In 8 degree weather.

Nah. He hadn't done that.

Or at the very least, that would be another thing he'd never admit. Nope...definitely not something to admit.

He turned to find her at the other end of the dock, trudging her way slowly towards him. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and grinned at her, an altogether too-pleased look on his face.

* * *

She stopped, about halfway down the dock, and looked around. 

"It's so beautiful here. I hadn't even imagined..." Jean trailed off. She twirled just a bit on her toes, head thrown back to stare at the twinkling stars above her.

Logan had trouble keeping his eyes off of Jean. She was almost child-like in her awe of her surroundings, so absorbed in taking it all in.

Jean stopped twirling and leveled her gaze at him, a small smirk on her face.

"If you controlled the weather, I would say you planned this."

He shrugged, taking a step towards her.

"I ain't the weather witch, an' you know this. If I was, I woulda dumped about 20 more feet of snow out of the sky. This little bit of snow is for pansies."

Jean giggled and took a step towards Logan.

"Well, since it wasn't you, I suppose I won't accuse you too much."

He scooted forward just a bit more.

"Well then, I appreciate it, Red."

_Red...My old nickname...He called me Red..._

There was something so comforting, so familiar about that nickname. His use of it warmed her...it gave her something she knew she'd cherish and remember.

_Something so small...but so meaningful._

She took another step forward.

"I see how the boathouse has had some additions. It looks good. I bet it gets a lot more use now."

Logan gazed at the boathouse for a moment, then turned back to Jean as he inched towards her.

"Yeah, ol' One Eye, Peter, Beast and I worked on it. We did all the additions ourselves, with a lil' help from the students. It was supposed to be a 'team building' project or some such crap. Anyway, it was fun."

Jean turned to look at the handiwork more closely and nodded.

"Sounds like something Scott would suggest."

Another step.

"Actually, Ems was the one who suggested it."

Another scoot forwards.

Jean raised an eyebrow.

"Ms. Frost actually suggested something...useful? And yet Hell hasn't frozen over yet. I'm amazed."

Logan had to chuckle at that.

"Yeah, well, the way it feels out here, you may be wrong about Hell not freezin' over, darlin."

They both stepped forward and now only had a little more than a foot separating them.

She couldn't suppress the giggle.

_I sound like a complete retard, giggling like a schoolgirl. _

_She sounds completely happy, gigglin' like a schoolgirl._

They were silent, each pondering these thoughts for a moment.

"Would you lik-"

"Do you wann-"

Silence. Try again.

"We could go sit in the boathouse, if you want. You've gotta be freezin."

Jean realized she'd been shivering, for how long she didn't know. She turned the tiniest bit of a puppy-dog look on Logan.

"Well...maybe. Just let me enjoy the view for a bit more, please?"

_Aw hell. Big green eyes and that puppy look. Dammit, Jeannie..._

"Yeah, ok. Sure. You warm enough?"

She bit her lip just a bit, and Logan had to hold back from leaning in and kissing her.

"I'm mostly ok. Hands are freezing cold, though."

Logan reached his hands out, beckoning.

"Lemme warm 'em up. My hands are almost too warm."

She thought for a moment, almost as if weighing the consequences, and then seemed to decide that she didn't care. Icy, balled up hands were thrust into warm, calloused hands as the two figures on the dock stepped closer. Almost on a whim, Logan turned her around and pulled her against his chest, his arms wrapped around her waist, hands still cradling hers.

_I really hope I didn't just screw this up. You're supposed to take it slow, Logan..._

"Better?"

Jean wondered if she dared to breathe, or even dare to admit how nice his arms felt around her.

_This isn't...It's not what you're here for and mm, muscles and warmth and FOCUS JEAN and oh to hell with it..._

She snuggled back against him, just a little bit, and sighed contentedly.

"Mmmm...yeh."

Now it was Logan's turn to wonder if he dared to breathe, or even dare to admit how nice she felt against his chest.

_Oh holy hell why did you do this dammit Logan YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO but she seems happy and oh to hell with it..._

He inhaled deeply, savoring the smell of her shampoo and the feel of her. This was how he pictured them so much of the time, wrapped up together, looking out over the lake or over cliffs or just anywhere, as long as they were together.

They stood as such, at peace and silent, until Jean felt him stiffen and pull back slightly.

"What's wrong?"

_Aw hell..._

"Er, well, it's Ems...They need me for a mission...and they're coming here to pick me up."

Jean turned and gaped at him.

_Aw, shit...Not Scott...not now..._


	5. Confrontation, part 1

**Title: Starting Over (title may change as story goes on)**

Pairing: Well, several. Jean/Logan and Scott/Emma for sure. Maybe a bit of Kitty/Colossus and Rogue/Remy for fun and flair. We'll see.

Rating: T at the beginning (mainly for language, because dude...seriously...Logan swears a lot.), M (for fluff, maybe?) later on.

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THIS OR ANY MARVEL CHARACTERS. Ever. Please don't sue, eh? All I have in life is my precious lappy.

A/N: Ok folks. Real life has intruded massively and I haven't updated it in forever. I can't promise steady updates...but...I have started working on it again. This is a short chapter, but there will be more in the next week or two. :D Thank you to all of you who messaged me while i was away and begged me to write again. You've inspired me!

* * *

Logan cursed as he felt Jean stiffen in his arms.

_It's too soon. It's too damn soon for her to see them, for them to see her. Dammit._

She pulled away, whirled at him with an expression on her face that tore at his heart.

"Did you call them here to 'take care of me' again? I thought…I was under the imp-"

"Jeannie!!" He almost roared. He instantly regretted it. "I ain't a traitor. I didn't call 'em down on ya. Read my mind if ya don't believe me. Ems is saying we have a situation. Some neo-mutant or some such crap. They're coming to pick me up."

At that moment, the Blackbird flew over the trees and landed.

"Lemme handle this."

Logan turned toward the jet, fists balled and prepared for the eventuality of a fight. He knew Scott's opinion, and Emma had been fairly clear after the death of all those clones made from her ova. She vowed vengeance on the Phoenix, probably on Jean too for being the host of the Phoenix. He had a feeling this wasn't going to turn out well.

* * *

Jean looked so frail, standing there on the dock as Logan walked toward the Blackbird. She felt a stream of desperate fear shoot up from her stomach. She stumbled forward, dreading the coming meeting.

_I'm not ready to see Scott. I'm not ready. I miss them…..but this is too soon….too soon…._

She could see two figures stepping out of the jet, the tension in Logan's shoulders as he walked toward them. It only took a few seconds before the taller figure looked beyond Logan to her and lifted a hand to his head.

"Scott, n-"

Jean watched as Logan lunched for the figure, now obviously Scott Summers, knocking into the snow. Beside him, Emma was preparing to psychically castrate Jean. She sent an overload of her power into the redhead's brain, and Jean collapsed to the ground.  The blonde smirked and would have prepared a finishing blow, but a gruff voice interrupted her.

"Ems, you do it and One Eye here dies."

Emma turned and took in Logan, sprawled on the ground, his legs wrapped around Scott's waist and his hand to Scott's head. One small flex and those adamantium claws would rip through Scott's brain, and that would be the end of him. She straightened, sending one of her infamous icy glares in his direction.

"What makes you think I won't lobotomize you on the spot?"

"Good luck getting in my head and not losing yourself. You know that as well as anyone, Ems. Don't test me."

By this point, Jean managed to stand up. She moved towards Emma cautiously, her psychic shields now up and her mind warily prepared for any attack.

"Emma, I'm not your enemy. I'm no-"

"Listen, you bint, I don't care. You destroyed my children! I can't forgive you for that. No matter what it takes, I will keep the Phoenix from ever existing in any form, on this planet or any other."

Jean swallowed and glanced at Logan, unsure of what to do next…


	6. Confrontation, part 2

**Title: Starting Over (title may change as story goes on)**

**Pairing: Well, several. Jean/Logan and Scott/Emma for sure. Maybe a bit of Kitty/Colossus and Rogue/Remy for fun and flair. We'll see.**

**Rating: T at the beginning (mainly for language, because dude...seriously...Logan swears a lot.), M (for fluff, maybe?) later on.**

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THIS OR ANY MARVEL CHARACTERS. Ever. Please don't sue, eh? All I have in life is my precious lappy.**

**A/N: Long time no see, eh? But I'm here! And this is a decent update! Because it's an update, period! So don't hate me?? 3 R&R. : ) This is also somewhat quickly written, but it's not horrible (I don't think…). And I have the next chapter started! Woo! **

--

Logan growled, his mind racing.

_This is one hell of a bind we have ourselves in…_

Emma Frost, icy telepath and vengeful "mother" of thousands of Stepford Cuckoos, was this close to trying to make sure neither he nor Jean Grey took more than two more steps. Ever. And Scott, well….Scott was wrapped up in trying to be a good leader. And a good leader never stops fighting. The proof of this was currently being felt in Logan's abdomen, where Scott's elbow was currently lodged.

"Ow. Can it, boyscout. Don't make me have to kill you and Ems both."

Scott's elbow pulled back a fraction of an inch and he put on his most reasonable voice.

"Look, Logan. I know you have…" Scott nearly choked, "…feelings for Jean, still, but if she's the Phoenix…I won't let her get destructive the way she has so many times. If you just let me go, I'm sure we can work this ou-"

"Shut. Your. Mouth." Logan's other arm tightened around Scott's neck.

--

Jean and Emma were facing off, mentally arguing and battling with each other. Jean was stronger, and they both knew it. But Emma was a force to be reckoned with in her own right; her newfound motherly instincts fueled the rage that boosted her powers, making her a match for Jean.

"_I know you don't trust me. You don't have reason to. But I'm not here to kill you. And if your blasted Cuckoos hadn't helped to keep the Phoenix separated, there are a lot of things that wouldn't have happened." _Jean's mental voice grated.

Emma barely paused to think through Jean's words/ "_I'm not falling for that and you know it._"

One chance. Jean had one chance to try and get out of this without anybody getting hurt.

She let down her shields.

Emma Frost was caught so off guard that she staggered and her mouth dropped. She had unrestricted access to Jean's mind, seeing everything that had happened since she had left for the White Hot Room last…and before.

Everything.

Every ounce of power, every drop of responsibility, every stab of heartache and pain. Every smile and moment of happiness. Awed, she browsed through memories and emotions as if they were a magazine, stopping here and there to examine certain parts up close.

She cringed when she ran across Jean's memories of Scott. Their quiet crushes, dating, marriage. Jean grimaced, and for a moment Emma was not only inordinately pleased but also scared.

_What if she still loves Scott?_

But the feelings emanating from Jean's brain were not of love, at least not the kind of love she had once felt for Scott. Pain, yes. Affection, yes.

But Jean Grey was no longer in love with Scott Summers.

It was silly, really. But that fact alone convinced Emma of the fact that the Phoenix was not here to cause problems. She turned to Scott, trying to figure out how to explain. She showed Scott her impressions, and while he relaxed in Logan's grip, she could sense the coming mandate.

"Fine. You're back. You're the Phoenix and you can keep being reborn. But I want you," Scott pointed to Jean, "where I can keep an eye on you. Get off me, Logan."

Logan wasn't entirely convinced that it wasn't a plan to get free, and he unconsciously tightened his grip.

"LOGAN. NOW." Scott was nearly roaring at this point, embarrassed and trying to save face.

Jean reassured Logan quietly. "It's alright. Emma knows."

Emma sniffed dismissively and replied tersely, "I still don't like you. But…whatever."

Logan released Scott completely, pushing him off. As he was about to sit up, he felt the small hands on his shoulders and stilled instantly. Trying to keep a hold of Scott, he'd completely missed her scent. Even her phasing ability couldn't keep him from smelling her.

"Hi, Logan."

"Hey there, kid. I guess you were the backup, eh? Shoulda known…."

Kitty pulled back and rose up from the snow, a small smile on her face. "Would you have really put a claw through Scott's head?"

"Maybe through his shoulder. Something fixable." Logan shrugged. He turned his attention to Scott, who was descending on Jean and reminding him very much of a vulture.

Scott pointed an accusing finger at Jean, stopping about two inches from her nose. "You picked a lousy time to come back. Logan will take you back to the school, since he's probably the only one who wants to see you right now. And I'll deal with you when I get back." He turned, ignoring the half sob that escaped Jean's lips, and called Emma and Kitty together, reminding them of the neomutant they needed to find.

Jean, tears streaming down her face, had only rarely felt more humiliated….and certainly never this unwelcome.


	7. Conflict

**Title: Starting Over (title may change as story goes on)**

**Pairing: Well, several. Jean/Logan and Scott/Emma for sure. Maybe a bit of Kitty/Colossus and Rogue/Remy for fun and flair. We'll see.**

**Rating: T at the beginning (mainly for language, because dude...seriously...Logan swears a lot.), M (for fluff, maybe?) later on.**

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THIS OR ANY MARVEL CHARACTERS. Ever. Please don't sue, eh? All I have in life is my precious lappy.**

**A/N: An update! This has been a long time coming…I hope you all don't hate me for this. :)**

* * *

Four months later…

Jean sat on her bed, folded into the lotus position, meditating. It was one of her few respites from the stress of being back in the mansion. Around her, objects from the top of her dresser floated…a bottle of perfume, a few candles, her hairbrush, pictures of her friends…it was all an exercise, focusing her powers and clearing her mind, making the manipulation of objects in space an almost automatic thing. Her mind wouldn't quiet down, though. She kept replaying the day's events ad nauseum.

She'd noticed very early on that the school was very short on teachers. Scott, Emma, and even Kitty (so grown up!) were all teaching, as were Ororo and Hank…even Logan had been pressed into teaching duties; however, even with that many teachers, there were still some classes that were short, especially on the scientific side of things. She'd held off saying anything until a month ago, when she approached Scott with a proposal.

"Scott? I have an idea…"

"Hmm?" He didn't even glance up from the papers he was grading. _Rude._

"You're short on teachers. I noticed it a while ago. The sciences, especially. And they're important, of course…"

"Uh huh. Get to the point, Jean. Do you know a science teacher who would be willing to teach at a school for mutants?"

Jean swallowed nervously before answering.

"Yeah….me."

Scott's head shot up and his eyes narrowed. "You? Why would you want to teach? And anyway, we discussed this. I don't want you around the students too much. With the Phoenix…it could be risky."

She almost huffed at that one. _Risky my ass…_

"I'm not a risk. I've been here for almost three months with no problems. I'm not a threat to anyone, and I have more of a scientific background than anyone here, partly because it's not just on the medical side of things. I'd be more of an asset than anything else and you know it."

The flick of his fingers dismissed her. "No. That's my answer. I can't deal with this right now."

She had let it drop after that until today. One of the students, a boy named Josh, had come up to her shyly and asked her for some help on his geology homework. As she had explained the workings of plate tectonics and how erosion could be tracked, she'd felt a warmth in her chest that was irresistible. Familiar, comforting…it was the joy of imparting knowledge to someone who really wanted it. She'd missed this so very badly. After sending Josh on his way, she marched into Scott's office without even bothering to knock and interrupted a discussion he was having with Emma.

"You need me as a teacher, and I need it for something to do. Why do you keep screwing around on this?"

That brought Emma and Scott to a halt.

"What are you talking about, Jean?" Scott's impatience was easy to read, even though Jean could sense it in his thoughts. "We've discussed this. It's risky and I'm not doing it. Period."

Emma was quiet, tilting her head in thought. Jean resisted the urge to rifle through her mind as she went on.

"I'm not a fucking liability. I'm a damned good teacher and you need me. Why do you keep dicking around like this?"

The look on Scott's face was worth that little bit of profanity. _Maybe I should swear more often…_ But his reaction afterwards wasn't. He'd bolted from his chair and towered over her, hands on his hips as he spoke down to her stubborn face.

"You're a liability and we all know it. Hell, Jean, you're not even wanted here. We didn't want you back. The team is scared you'll go nuts on us again and it's all I can do to keep you from being shipped off to the ends of the earth or given over to the Shi'ar. So you take yourself back to your room and stay there, out of my hair and out of everybody's problems, you hear me?"

Jean gaped at him, taken back by his vehemence. Even Emma was staring at Scott like he was some creature from the depths, alien and menacing. Jean tried to form words, but as her mouth tried to work she couldn't force any sounds from her throat. She looked up at Scott in horror and turned, tears beginning to stream down her face as she left his office.

_God damn bastard._

The objects from her dresser started vibrating, reacting to her agitation, and they weren't the only things reacting to her rage. The dresser and the loveseat across the room were lifting off the floor in response to the energy floating through the room. Opening her eyes, she saw the contents of her room swimming around the bed and put them back in their places. She was far from calmed, though. She focused, and about a foot in front of her face she reformed a few million molecules of air. First into heavy metals, just bordering on being unstable isotopes. Then into precious gems. Then the strongest of steel.

Over and over she cycled through various atomic formations, just for the hell of it. All her focus and concentration centered on the ball in front of her as it changed structure. She could feel the energy surging through the room, her misery and rage at being rebuffed and so hated fueling her creativity and the intricacy of the elements and objects she formed. She was just making a perfect sphere of titanium when there was a timid knock on her door, breaking her concentration to bits. The sphere of titanium fell to the ground, denting the hardwood floor as she rose to open to the door.

Emma Frost stood before her, looking ever so superior in those ridiculous stiletto boots she insisted on wearing. She managed a vague aura of politeness as she requested to come in.

Jean was curt, but not entirely rude as she stepped aside to let Emma enter. "Sure. Have a seat."

Emma looked around the room, eyes lingering on the pictures of the old team before she sat primly on the loveseat. Jean went back to sitting on her bed, staring at the woman across from her.

"Listen, I know we don't exactly…get along. The whole Scott thing and all." Emma paused, looking for some sort of signal from Jean. Jean rolled her eyes and kept silent, gesturing for Emma to continue.

"I wanted to let you know that Scott isn't exactly correct about how the others feel. I know about Josh coming to see you. I actually told him to ask you about his homework." Another pause, this time to let that tidbit sink in. Jean wasn't exactly sure what to do with this information, but she decided then and there to become far more attentive to Emma Frost. Emma went on, "We're actually, for the most part, glad to have you back. Even I'm glad you're here, if for no other reason than you can explain geology." She looked down before speaking again.

"Somehow…you bring balance. And Logan seems glad. I haven't had to listen to his nightmares for the past 3 months since you've been here." Emma glanced shrewdly at Jean, looking for some flicker of understanding, but got nothing. Jean was on lockdown, shielding her thoughts and her emotions. Does she know why…? No, no…but she's guessing. Eugh.

Emma rose, looking every inch the White Queen. "I just wanted to let you know that Scott is just…overstating things. You're not so unwelcome or unwanted as that. It didn't seem right to just let you feel that's how things were." And with that, she swept from the room, leaving Jean staring after her in confusion.

* * *

Night had set in and the mansion was already mostly wound down for the night. Logan could pick out Emma's snores from way down the hall, and he chuckled at the thought of Scott having to put up with that all night. Better him than me.

He'd stretched out in the dark, relishing the feel of letting his joints relax into the comfort of the bed. He'd had a long day of doing PE with some of the students, and while it wasn't particularly tiring, it did stretch him out more than he was used to. These younger students were finding creative ways to evade him in the Danger Room. He had to admit he was impressed. He just wouldn't say such a thing within earshot of any of the kids. No reason for them to get all uppity about their skills. It would just make them overconfident and lead to mistakes that could get them killed in real life.

He'd halfway dozed off when he caught the feel of the air pressure in the room changing from someone opening the door and slipping inside. While he'd normally be off the bed and have his claws out and at their necks in less than two seconds, he kept still. He knew who this was.

The figure padded across the room and paused at the end of the bed as if contemplating leaving. He almost spoke, but the figure had started moving again, settling on the other side of the bed Indian style.

"You're late tonight."

In the dark, he swore he could hear the figure smiling just a little. The quiet voice rippled through the room, warming his very bones.

"Yeah, well…I had some meditating to do, otherwise I'd be here angry…and we all know I'm not fun to be around when I'm angry."

Logan swallowed, wondering what he should say. He decided to be direct.

"I heard about your…discussion…with Scott. I'm sorry, Red. That kid has such a stick up his ass."

That got a chuckle, and he couldn't resist grinning just a bit. He hadn't heard that laugh nearly as often as he preferred.

Jean drew her knees up under her chin, contemplating Logan in the darkness. It was a minute before she spoke.

"I'm not a liability. I'm really not. Am I? Do you really hate that I came back?"

He was sitting up in an instant, arms wrapped around her shoulders.

"Jeannie…I don't hate that you came back. It's been hard, and Scott's just being an idiot. You're not all screwed up in the head like you were. If you actually were, you've blown out of here months ago without looking back. Instead, you've stuck with it and lived under One Eye's retardation with a smile and a nod the whole time. I don't know how you've managed to not smack him a good one when he starts in."

Jean giggled at that one, feeling idiotic but a smidge lighter at the same time. Her eyes closed, breathing in Logan's scent. Calming and earthy, with just a hint of something that smelled a bit like Old Spice. _Mmm…Old Spice… _Good thing he couldn't read her thoughts.

Logan stretched out again, pulling Jean against his side, smiling as she snuggled into him. Her sneaking into his room every night for the past three months had been the most wonderful torture. He couldn't keep his thoughts pure around her most of the time, but she'd been kind enough to not be angry at him. She didn't say a word about it, actually, and he wasn't sure whether to be worried or grateful. She had to know he wanted her, but he couldn't bring himself to make any moves on her. While she was so ridiculously strong, she'd also become somewhat fragile emotionally this time around. She'd refused to talk about it, and he wouldn't press her. But every night she came to his room and fell asleep by his side, snuggled into him and holding on for dear life, as if her dreams would pull her under otherwise. And he? Well…he had to admit he did the same thing. He wasn't waking the rest of the mansion up with his nightmares anymore. At least for now.

With that, he drifted off to quiet dreams of flames and softness that he could never quite remember the next day.


End file.
